Respect, Lost and Forgotten
When people refuse to see you as an equal it because they have a lack of respect for you. Respect by definition is “esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability.”(Dictionary.com) This suggest how someone must be known for a particular excellence before given the admiration of respect. I believe respect is the acknowledgment of worth between people. I believe it is in simpler words the acknowledgment of people as humans because all people should be considered worthy of humanity and life. Self worth is everything, yet self hate is the most present things around these days. The most secretive way self hate occurs in how people interact with their peers, lovers, family, etc. Too many people hate themselves so much that they allow the next person to treat them with no respect and don’t speak up about it.
It’s called I believe the gas light effect where a person will secretly manipulate, insult, and put forth a tone of superiority and intimidation. It’s not healthy and will make a person feel ill of themselves and unworthy of true love. True and positive love.
I have had many people gas me up only to honestly feel the most negative affirmations of myself and when they revealed all my faults secretly in the way they treated me I had misdirected anger or simple felt less of myself just because they simply had no respect for me. I refuse to fuck with another gas lighter serious on any level, not even in a work relationship; where people deal with nonsense for a check.
When you allow people to treat you in disrespectful ways it is only a reflection of how you see your own worth. Giving respect is like handing out confidence. It’s also equivalent to someone acknowledging that you both are equal. Respecting yourself should result in respect of others which should result in you receiving back respect; simple.
Respect Shouldn’t be So Complicated
If you interact with me you should think highly of me and I of you. There should be no in between. If I have expressed how negatively one has made me feel then they should fight to alter my perception because, one could have been misinterpreted by their own struggles of a bully mentality. At least you should if you care. If the person don’t care they will live a life without me which was meant to be the moment they thought it was ok to ever be shady in the first place.
The social interactions of people is complicated and people can’t be judged off pure action but intentions at best. If it is your true intention to make others feel less for you to feel great then you are an egotistical lunatic and may be cold of heart. Many people have simply been playing a societal roll unaware of their true implications. Those people may just be in need of knowledge and empathy.
Bottom line is to never allow anyone to make you handle yourself awkwardly or inferiorly when your intent is to only be loved and be yourself. Respect is important amongst social interactions. However, respect has been lost and altered many times in history and is most definitely almost obsolete in the black community. Respect yourself and DEMAND respect.
The saying is you must earn respect, but in reality with all of the “bs” and struggles man goes through, especially of African decent, respect should be given at sight amongst all. Help re-build our community and our mindsets by giving respect to our children, our spouses, family, and associates at all time. We are human and we all should begin to treat each other as just that and end the cycle of negative social tension amongst ourselves. 💕
I definitely will like to dedicate this post to the late and GREAT Aretha Franklin. She was a brown skin child that paved the way for so may women of color such as myself. She was a woman with a fierce attitude and refused to allow people to treat her the way they wanted just because she was a black woman. She demanded respect and gracefully earned it in a world that was so against her kind.